Day Eleven

I just finished working a double at work today, so, frankly, I am not exactly in the mood to write on this blog. I have been cracky for most of the day and quite a fiend for the cigarettes, which is quite unfortunate because it is exciting to be in double digit days of quitting. In a way, the novelty of 'quitting' has begun to fade and it daily becomes more of a reality. My 'smoker-self' has been considerably rebellious against this idea. I understand; today I was sympathizing with him and his imminent death, considering prolonging his life with me more strongly than the past few days. I just must keep reminding myself that I do exist as a normal, functioning self without cigarettes; that they are like any other accessory I use to keep my pants up or tell time; that they are useless, harmful, unnecessary, and stupid.